You’re Called to More—But Fear is Keeping You Comfortable: Stepping Into the Next Level of Purpose, Power, and Leadership

0:03 What if the biggest thing standing between you and your next level is not a lack of talent, a lack of opportunity, or even a lack of resources, but fear disguised as comfort. Some of us are praying for growth while simultaneously protecting the comfort zones that are quietly keeping us small. You know you're called to more, but fear has convinced you that staying comfortable is safer than becoming who you were truly designed to be. Welcome back to the Road to an Effective Classroom Environment. I am your host, Dr. LaShante, known as that Classy Sassy consultant.

0:44 I am an educator, coach, author, and advocate for purposeful leadership and growth. And today's episode is dedicated to one of my best friends, Lisa, and it is entitled Your Call to More, but Fear is Keeping You Comfortable. This conversation is for the educator who knows they're capable of more, the leader who feels stuck, the entrepreneur afraid to launch out, and the visionary who keeps shrinking their voice to fit fit familiar spaces. So today we're going to discuss fear and comfort zones, talk about purpose, leadership, and what it truly means to step into your next level.

1:30 So if that is you, this conversation is definitely going to be a blessing to you today.

1:39 So what does comfort look like when it's a problem? So we're talking about comfort in the mindset of you are stagnated, not wanting to develop, not wanting to grow. That is the type of comfort, comfort we're talking about, the type that keeps you from doing better, or to go out and do more, or to reach further for your dreams. So we're going to talk about the problem with that. So comfort feels safe. It's like that security blanket. It's like those sweatpants that you wear on the weekends. But growth requires movement.

2:27 So when we're talking about comfort, when it's a problem, it becomes it feels so safe that you don't want to move out of it. It's like on that winter's day where you're snuggled up under your blankets and you're so warm and you're content and you're at peace with where you are that you don't want to get up and move, and you might be there for hours knowing that you've got to get out and uh shovel the snow off of the driveway, or you've got to go get groceries. We're talking about the comfort that keeps you from progressing.

3:03 Fear often disguises itself as logic, and many people delay purpose because uncertainty feels uncomfortable. When you don't know what's going to happen, sometimes we are very fearful of that because we want everything to come out just right. We don't want any problems. Some of us we don't want to fail because there's a fear of failure. We're going to talk about that a little bit later on as well. Stability and stagnation are not the same thing. So stability is about balance and consistency and unchanging.

3:41 And so stability is what we associate with the good comfort. Stagnation is that type of comfort that is blocking you from doing what it is that you want to do. When you're stagnated, you have blocked movement. There's no movement going on at all, no flow, no flowing of ideas, no going out and trying to do anything different. So stability and stagnation are not the same thing. Stability I think of as the good comfort. And then stagnation is that that problem comfort. Comfort can quietly become a cage.

4:26 That's not where you want to be in your life. You don't want to be so comfortable with where you are and what you're doing. That, and you know that there is more within you that says, There is something else I need you to do. There is something else that has been a yearning or calling in your heart, and you know you're supposed to do it, but you keep ignoring the signs because you want to remain where you are, and you're in this imaginary cage, and so being comfortable can debilitate growth, and you want to watch that type of stuff.

5:04 You don't want to get to a place where you are debilitated to the point where you are no longer growing. You cannot become who you're meant to be while constantly clinging to who you've always been. I'm gonna say that one more time. You cannot become who you're meant to be while constantly clinging to who you've always been.

5:33 The comments of I'm just a soft-spoken person. I don't like to come out of my comfort zone. This is what's best for me because I can't change. Those are phrases that are used by individuals who are holding on to who they think they are or who they have been. But you have to keep in mind that when you are stepping out of those comfort zones, you are stepping into becoming a different you. Change is good, and you can still be who you are and implement change. So I want you to reflect on this as we're going through this discussion.

6:15 I have a question that I want you to reflect on. What opportunities have you delayed because fear convinced you to stay comfortable? What opportunities have you delayed because fear convinced you to stay comfortable? I'll share a story with you. And so as I was going through my journey of wanting to gain a doctoral degree, I knew those of you that have been listening to the program long enough, you've heard me talk about wanting to be a doctor since I was 11 years old. Didn't know what kind of doctor, because at one point, for a brief moment in my middle school career, I thought about um being a medical doctor, but I wanted, I set my sights on and I said, I want to be Dr. LaShante.

7:09 Dr. LaShante. I wanted that. And so I wanted to have it by the time that I was 40. That did not happen. And there had been a point in time where I did not think it was going to happen because I had maxed out my loans when it came to my student loans, when it came to uh me getting my master's, and I had tried some other programs, rehabilitation counseling. That was something I I started to do because I did not see how I was gonna be able to get over this hump with the cap or whatever where I thought I was, I thought I had capped out with my student loans.

7:49 But I said, maybe this is just not for me because I didn't get it at 40 and I was gonna give up on it. I was gonna give up on my dream, even though I'd had that goal and held on to it. But then a window of opportunity opened up, and my cap was not there anymore when it came down to my student loans. So I was able to pursue the doctoral degree, and I was able to get it. And it did not matter at that point in time when I stepped across that stage, it no longer mattered that I did not get it by age 40.

8:26 All that mattered is that I got it, but I had gotten to the place of being comfortable and saying, you know, hey, this is just what it, this is what it is. I know I don't have the money to do it out of pocket right now, even a payment plan is not feasible because I was still helping and supporting my children at this point in time, so and and single parents, so there was no way it was gonna happen in my mind, but it happened, and I'm so glad it did, and I'm so glad I did not allow the fear of finances to keep me from getting to that dream of having that um particular uh that particular goal satisfied.

9:09 So we're gonna talk about fear and how it shows up in education and how it shows up in leadership and entrepreneurship. And I chose those three areas because those are three areas that I'm operating in. But this is a message that no matter what field you're in, no matter where you are, this is a message for single moms, single dads, it's for couples, it's for anyone that has a fear of elevating or going to that next level. So, but we're gonna focus on three areas education, leadership, and entrepreneurship.

9:44 So, in education, and this is for anybody that is under that umbrella of being an educator, from the administrative assistant to the custodial staff, cafeteria worker, bookkeeper. This is not just classroom teachers, assistant principals, principals, district leaders, everyone that falls under that umbrella of education. So sometimes in education, we see where individuals avoid leadership opportunities. So fear can show up as avoidance, fear of taking on a leadership opportunity. So this could look like in a school setting, let's say you're the teacher who was asked to present the data for your department because the math department chair is no longer in the building, and you are the backup chair for right now and maybe the the it person until the end of the year.

10:46 But you're also that one that's soft-spoken and and you don't like putting yourself out as sometimes the young people might say. I don't know if the young people say this anymore, but Front Street, you don't want to put yourself out there anymore. You don't want to put yourself out there uh for several reasons. The visibility piece, which we're gonna talk about, and so you avoid it. You say, Not me, let someone else do it. Even though you got the knowledge, you can you know data left and right, you avoid it.

11:14 So avoid it, so fear shows up as avoidance and passing up on leadership opportunities. We are leaders in our right end. Whatever we're doing within education, you are a leader and you have to know that. And passing up opportunities to have your voice heard is can stifle you being seen. And you may say, Oh, well, I don't want to be seen. I don't want to be heard, I just want to be quiet in my corner classroom, or I want to be able to scoop these potatoes on this tray, and that, and that's all that's all I come in here to do.

11:49 That's a whole different episode because we in our roles of being here on this earth, there are so many things that we're supposed to be doing outside of just of using that word just. I'm just a teacher, I'm just a custodian, I'm just a superintendent. We don't want to put that word just in front of anything. You are who you are, and you are called to do even more than that. So don't avoid leadership opportunities. Fear can also show up by staying silent in important conversations. And I've talked about this in other episodes and talking about how when you're given that opportunity to speak, when you're given that opportunity to share ideas, I encourage you to share ideas amongst those on your hall, in your clusters, even when you're in um larger group settings within the educational fold, just make sure that you should, if you have an idea or you a thought, that you share it.

12:51 Now, I'm the type of person that I'm listening to everyone, I'm a listener, and when I had and the old me, if I had something to say, I would wait until everyone else said what they had to say, and then I would try to speak. But I was also the type that I didn't like cutting people off while they were talking. And I'm still that way. I don't want to cut you off. But once I have read the room and I and I I read the personalities that I'm around, sometimes you have to jump into a conversation and to make sure that you're getting hurt and you do it in a respectful way.

13:28 So you have to read the room, read the personalities, and if you have where everyone in your particular group, they're very outgoing, very talkative, you've got to get in when you fit in, but you want to make sure that your ideas are heard as well. So stop saying staying silent in in conversations that you're having in your buildings outside of your buildings, and then fear can show up whenever new innovative ideas and strategies are implemented or new technology because we don't want to fail, we don't want to see those things fail.

14:02 Some people will not try, some educators will not try anything with AI because there's a fear. And I've talked about this on in another episode or a couple of episodes in discussing AI and artificial intelligence, and how if you don't become acclimated or at least get an idea of the of the ins and outs, get the basics under your belt. You're you're leaving yourself behind because right now education is implementing AI. You have curriculum that has been developed, you have where school districts have already put that curriculum out, you have where you can get certifications, students can earn certifications and understanding AI and certain elements.

14:48 And so if there's a fear of this, you've got to get beyond it. And I had a fear of AI, I didn't want anything to do with it. But once I went to a particular conference in locally, it was in the upstate of South Carolina, went to a conference in Greenville. And when I listened to this gentleman speak about how we have been immersed in AI for years without really knowing it, then I started thinking a little differently about it. And I'm like, oh, okay, so Alexa is AI. So a lot of these different programs I've been using in my home, their AI or in the car.

15:35 So once I had the right information presented to me in such a way where it wasn't scary, I wasn't reading some article on TikTok about how AI is going to take over and humans are not going to have any jobs and so forth. When I was able to get knowledge from someone who was able to break the information down and to get a better understanding, and it wasn't a scare tactic and saying this is what AI is going to do to humans, then I was able to accept it more and embrace it. So, in in education, just as we're teaching our students to accept the knowledge that we're giving them, that we're implanting in them, that we're immersing them in about our content or our whatever area that we're in, or even and even soft skills.

16:24 Just as we do that, we ourselves have to give up on that fear of that new thing, whether it's AI or whether it's a new program. We can't we have to get away from that fear. And then remaining in burnt out cycles because change feels risky. Sometimes we in education don't want to do anything differently than what we are currently doing. We hear the phrase and we say it and we write it on the wall. If it ain't broke, don't try to fix it. There are some things that have been broken for years, but we have neglected to try to fix or repair or to do anything that will cause improvement because we're tired ourselves.

17:14 And as I have um talked about in one of the episodes, you're not burnt out, you're misaligned. If you're in that cycle of where you think you're burnt out, you're really not, you're really not burnt out. Now, there are some that they go through a burnt out cycle, but you're misaligned when you are not willing to take risks and to to make changes in what you're doing in education. So that's how fear shows up in education. In leadership, as leaders, we may feel that we don't want to be visible. Again, going back to we shrink back, we don't want to be seen, we don't want to be heard.

17:58 Because if you're visible, then that leaves the door open for you to be exposed or vulnerable because everything you do and say is under a microscope. So there is that fear of visibility in leaders. Some leaders also fear disappointing people. No one wants to cause others to feel rejected or neglected. But as leaders, we know that when we make decisions, everyone's not going to be happy with the decisions that we make. There's always going to be someone that does not get their way or is not being accommodated because it's just not possible.

18:44 And it may not be because we just don't want to accommodate them. But we also, as leaders, is always another leader that's over us, and they're having to look at financing and they have to look at uh personnel and see whether or not resources that we want to provide for our staff if it's going to work, because that leader over us has leaders has other leaders that they have to also support as well. So in leadership, you have those leaders that don't want to disappoint people, so they don't go out and do next level thinking and next level things.

19:26 We'll just stay where we are. Then there's the fear of making difficult decisions. The first time that I had to sit down with a teacher when I was young in my career as an administrator, I was in my 30s. And so when I had to sit down with a teacher and talk to her about how she spoke to a student and how the remarks were not appropriate, it was I knew it was going to be a difficult difficult conversation because this was not an individual that was receptive to um being critiqued and being told that you know she was wrong.

20:08 And so I knew it would be one of those difficult conversations. And I I was the type, and I'm still the type, I don't like confrontation, I don't like you know controversy, I don't, you know, like when uh, you know, people are are judgmental. And so I felt all of that before going into the session. And so I had to get rid of that because in order for me to help this teacher to understand what she did wrong, I needed to make sure that I had myself in check and not having those feelings of oh of dread of having the conversations.

20:52 Because it was, it was, it was dread. The first the first conversation with a teacher about what she did wrong, it was there was some dread there. And but over time, it has gotten better. Not that is definitely not an issue now, but early leaders, sometimes those difficult conversations may be a little difficult, and we may there's that fear of having them, but we have to have them, and then the fear of being misunderstood. I cannot tell you how many times I have made comments that were taken out of context, emails that were taken out of context, and and it's very easy for emails to be taken out of context.

21:36 You would think that passages that are longer would be the ones that were most misunderstood understood, but it's the short ones as well. It could be one or two sentences, and and it could be blown into something totally different. So some leaders have that fear of being misunderstood, and then in entrepreneurship.

22:45 Those who have brilliant ideas of goods and services that they could provide, some people never step up to the bat because they fear launching. There's a fear of just getting started, of not knowing where to start. When I began my uh my company, Lee Jane's Consulting in June of 2022, I did not have a blueprint of what I was going to do. Despite what people may think it, I did not have a blueprint. I had an idea, and I'm very thankful for my hairstylist. She was the one that encouraged me to start an LLC when I was talking with her about what I wanted to provide, the services and products that I wanted to be able to provide.

23:38 And my business really started because I wanted to help international teachers to become acclimated to the communities that they serve. Because there was there is a need to make sure that teachers who come over from other countries that they know how to interact with the students in the states, in the local areas in which they begin to reside and work. Because sometimes it's that which keeps them from remaining in the country because of the disconnect between the relationship building with the students.

24:22 So that's how Lee Jane started. And I had no idea of where I was going with it because for a year and a half I did nothing with the company because I wanted to get a manual together of how to help the teachers. And I was working on this manual. And um, as I was talking to my stylist, as I was going, you know, going to her and so forth, and she said, You you just just got to start somewhere. You know, you gotta develop, but you know, you gotta start somewhere. And so I began, I saw boot camp advertised by my former Mary Kay consultant.

24:57 I was a consultant under her, my Mary Kay director. And so she had she had developed a business where she helped people with their branding. And that boot camp that she had uh put together, that was the start of me putting things in place of what did I need to do to start developing my ideas and my goals of what I wanted to do. And so the fear of launching, just begin. If you have an idea, start looking at things that will help you to get some ideas in place. If you're not on LinkedIn, LinkedIn is a is a great platform for entrepreneurs, businesses, and organizations, and you can get a wealth of knowledge that's that's free just in in creating connections with people on there.

25:52 So just start. As an entrepreneur, you don't know where to start, just start. Get the business started, develop it, start with the business plan, start with your vision, your mission, and then from there, everything else can fall into place. You also have entrepreneurs that are have the fear of fear of charging what you're worth. And that can be that definitely can be a fear because you don't want to have your your prices so low that you're not making money, but then you don't want to have them so high that you think people are not going to want to buy these products or services.

26:36 But you know what your worth is, you know your value, and you can't be afraid of a number. You can't be afraid to say that my coaching services are worth X amount of dollars, and this is what I charge. And if someone cannot meet where you are, then that person may not be the one that needs to be linked up with you. Now you may say, well, oh, what about cutting deals and having, you know, doing discounts and so forth? There's nothing wrong with that. But first and foremost, when you set a price for your services, for your products, know that you're setting it because this is what those things are worth.

27:18 And don't be afraid of putting a number. I was afraid of a number when I first began, but I'm not now. So don't be afraid of the number. Don't be afraid of saying what you're worth. And then there's that fear of being online. There are some entrepreneurs they are not online and they're fine with it. And if if you have that hustle where you rather do uh face-to-face and talking to people, then that's your that is what you do. But there are those who they know that a part of their business is they need to be online to meet people, but there's that fear.

27:54 There's that fear of being scammed, there's that fear of hackers, there's there's all types of fears about being online. But you have to get out of that fear as well. Set up the right parameters, make sure you have the right um equipment, the right software to prevent hackers and things of that sort. And then also being able to have some discernment about who you're talking to online as well. And then the fear of growth, the fear that when you grow, that your relationships with your the people within your circle will change.

28:30 Anything that you're doing as a business owner, as an entrepreneur, as a leader, the relationships are going to change. The amount of time that you're able to devote when you're just beginning, or when you're in the middle and you have this growth spur, and you just have people coming out of the woodworks that need you, yes, relationships are going to change. The time that you're able to devote to individuals and being able to talk or go to the movies or go to a concert, it's going to change. And some people don't want that.

29:05 They don't they want to be able to still be in contact with those in their circle in the same amount of time. But if you're wanting to pursue your area of uh whatever product or service that you are out there trying to make sure you get into the forefront of people, just know that relationships are going to change. All right. So just wanted to leave you with some signs of fear. The signs, signs of fear that you are stuck. So just some things that uh wanted to share with you that may show you that you are stuck.

29:51 So if you're stuck if you begin overthinking everything, if you are over preparing but never executing, constantly seeking validation, you want someone to tell you that you're on the right track. Sometimes you don't know you're on the right track until someone says they want what you have, they want that service. So if you're seeking validation constantly as you are working in your business or working as an educator, as a leader, then you're you're not getting to the next level because the next level does involve sometimes making mistakes, it may involve um failing a time or two.

30:36 You may be stuck if you avoid opportunities that require visibility, and we've talked about that. You may be stuck if you stay busy instead of a line, just doing work and to say you're doing it and it doesn't line up, there isn't a blueprint in place of what you're what you're doing and how that lines up with what you're doing, then you're probably stuck because you're just doing things and you're not actually aligned with your mission, with your vision of your company, of your business, of the school, the school district that you are working in.

31:19 And then you may be stuck if you shrink your voice to remain comfortable. If you shrink back in order for someone else to stand up and be seen, then you're probably stuck because there's gotta be some times in which you are willing to speak up and let your voice be heard, let your ideas be shared. Busy does not always mean align. Keep that in the forefront of your mind. Then I have another reflection for you. Think about this. What area of your life currently reflects fear more than faith? So, as you are stepping into your next level, I'm gonna give you a few actionable strategies that you can use in order to get to that next level.

32:13 The first strategy is to just be honest, get honest with yourself about what you really want. Stop minimizing your dreams. I am going to be a millionaire. I have put that out there, I'm saying it, and I truly believe it. So, in order to do that, I've got to stop thinking small. So dream big. Define your next level clearly. Write the vision, make it plain, write it down, type it out, stick it on your refrigerator. That way, when you see it as you leave out in the mornings or the afternoons when you're going out to work, you see what your plan is.

32:52 You know what your vision is. So get honest with yourself about what you want. Because if you want a million-dollar, if you have a million-dollar dream, then there's some million-dollar actions that got to take place. Stop waiting to feel ready. You are not always gonna feel up to going to the next level. So you can't wait until you're ready. Because if you wait until you are ready, you'll never be ready. Confidence grows through movement. The more you do, the more confident you will become.

34:08 I needed to share. And so I'm grateful for those individuals that have kind of you know pushed me out into the water, so to speak, because it's helped me to develop into who I am today. Growth stretches identity, it helps you to become who you really are. So I was that sweet, nice, kind, and quiet young lady in school. And those of you that are listening, that are my classmates and my former teachers, do not chuckle because I have had some to tell me. I don't remember you being so so uh quiet. I remember that.

34:46 So that's what matters. I was nice, kind, sweet, and I still am. I don't think I'm as quiet though. Um, I have my moments um when I can be a recluse, but definitely outspoken, very much outspoken now. And so just keep it in mind growth does stretch your identity, and then separate fear from intuition. Fear says stay safe. That's what we've been talking about today. Fear tells you to stay safe, purpose says move forward, keep going, keep moving ahead. And another strategy for you to get to your next level, change your environment.

35:30 Sometimes we are around people who are naysayers, they are ones who are the no-nos. There's a book that I use in my professional uh learning communities called The Iceberg is melting, and it's about penguins who are living in a colony and their iceberg is melting, and they're having to make decisions about what should they do. And there's a segment of the colony that of penguins that are called the no-nos because everything, every idea that's ever ever brought up is no, we can't do that. No, we can't do this.

36:09 So change your environment. Sometimes you have to get yourself from around people who are not going to help push you to the next level. Proximity influences growth. The closer that you are to people who are like-minded and that want to also go to the next level, they're also trying to grow. That's important. That's going to help you. And then again, get around people who challenge your thinking. So sometimes you don't need to just be around people that are that are on your side. Sometimes you and sometimes you need to be around those who are going to say, Well, tell me more.

36:49 What else can you show me that will help convince me that this is the way to go? So people who challenge your thinking can be very good for you. Have those people around. You don't want to always be the smartest person in the room. And then move before you feel fully prepared. Action creates momentum. So even when you feel like this is not what I'm trying to do right now, I'm gonna do it next week, I'm gonna do it next month, get out of that mindset and just do it. Just move. The next level of your life will require a version of you that your comfort zone has never met.

37:31 I love that quote. Love that quote. So here are some other questions I want you to reflect on as we come to, we're closing out this episode. Ask yourself, where have I become too comfortable? What is fear costing me? And what opportunities have I ignored? And what version of myself am I afraid to become? And then I want you to answer this question. Write this down somewhere, and you can put your response, put it on your refrigerator, put it on your laptop, put it somewhere in your office so that you can see it.

38:11 So the question is if fear was removed from the equation, what would I pursue immediately? If fear was removed from the equation, what would I pursue immediately? So as we close out, you were not created to live beneath your potential. There is another level of purpose, leadership, influence, healing, and impact waiting for you, but you cannot step into it while negotiating with fear every single day. The next level requires courage, the next level requires movement, the next level requires belief.

38:56 And sometimes the greatest act of leadership is finally saying yes to yourself. If this podcast encouraged you, challenged you, or inspired you, share it with another educator, leader, entrepreneur, or visionary who may be sitting on their next level because fear has made comfort feel acceptable. To learn more about coaching, consulting, leadership development, and profess and professional growth services, visit LeeJane's Consulting LLC.com. Thank you for listening to the Road to an Effective Classroom Environment.

39:34 Until next time, continue leading with purpose, growing with intention, and creating environments where transformation can truly happen.